and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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