Who did Billy Mays play for?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize