you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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