the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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