Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize