what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
