This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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