Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize