You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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