Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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