Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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