I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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