we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
