Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Everything about him screamed your future.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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