How'd it feel making her break her religion?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
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