We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
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