If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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