My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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