He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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