Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
