My room smells like vodka and shame
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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