like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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