I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize