nut hugger
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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