i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
