Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
