Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
