need another drink. this is the easiest way
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
