so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Randomize
