I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
