woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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