The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
