Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize