did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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