just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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