I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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