hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i think i have two assholes
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
