Buhtt sex?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
