Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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