My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
