guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
