Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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