Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
