I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
