i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
You are the jesus of drinking
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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