Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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