you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
