My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
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