Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
