Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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