you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Randomize
